Day 9

The picture is from today but the story is from yesterday. I wanted to post this story yesterday but didn't have time.

Every Wednesday, Madison has Early Intervention therapy, and her therapist comes up to the house and works with her for about a hour. Yesterday, she was showing Madison an alphabet book. Each page had a picture of the something beginning with that letter in the alphabet. When they got to "D", there was a picture of a dog. The therapist asked Madison what it was and Madison looked at the picture and said "Scout!" Amy and Paul have a dog named Scout and that is the only dog she has really ever been around. I thought it was too cute not to share.

Day 8

Tonight, as I was cooking dinner, Madison was playing with our bread bag. It was our bread from last week so there was only a few pieces left in it. She LOVES to carry the bag around and toss it back and forth. She did this the entire time I cooked dinner. As we were getting ready to sit at the table to eat, I told Madison it was time to put the bag down. Now begins the break down. She started crying and screaming as I was putting her in her highchair. She finally settled down but wouldn't eat. She kept turning her head when I would try to feed her and would point to the bag. I told her she couldn't have the bread bag back until she ate all of her dinner. Well, the whining continued and after about 10 minutes, I got up and grabbed the bag and put it in the garbage can. She just looked at me with these big tears in her eyes and I explained to her why she lost the bag. After pouting for a little bit, Madison finished her dinner.

After we finished eating, I went to change her diaper and put her back in her walker as I cleaned the kitchen. Well, I didn't shut the pantry door all the way and as I am doing the dishes I turned around to check on her and found her leaning over the garbage can trying so hard to get the bag out of the trash. The pictures were just too cute not to post. She still didn't get the bag back but was still a happy girl!

Day 7

I took this picture this afternoon as the sun was starting to go down. It was so funny to watch Madison's face as she watched her shadow on the wall move. She didn't know weather she should laugh or cry!

I used to love this time of year as the weather turned cool. Now, I find myself sinking into this depression as fall is here and winter is quickly approaching. Winters are so brutal on I-Cell children. Last year was the first fall we went through with the knowledge of what Madison had. I had just joined the support group on facebook. I was not emotionally prepared for what all happened last year. In the small I-cell community we lost, I believe, 6 children, in a 4 month time frame. Three of those children I hadn't gotten to be pretty close to. The reality of what we are up against really hit home.

Today, I had myself a pity party. I was asking God why we had to go through this? Why did he have to choose my daughter to have this disease. I hate that Madison isn't able to go and do like healthy children can. It breaks my heart for her. After voicing my anger to God, I finished praying. Shortly after that, I had such a peace in my heart. Why not us? As hard as this journey is, I thank the Lord that Madison was born into our family. It breaks my heart even more to know that she could have been born into a family who would not have cared for or loved her the way we do.

I am constantly reminded of this when I go out and see parents who talk horribly to their children and just don't care for them AT ALL. That is why Madison was born into our family. I would not trade anything for the joy and happiness she has brought to us. Not only us, as our family, but friends and people whom we have never met. As a Christian, I just wish I could touch as many people as our precious Madison has.

I know I will have these pity parties every now and then, and that's okay. I know that the Lord hears my cries. I know that Madison will one day be healed of this disease, whether it be on earth or heaven, and I will always praise his name because I know His will was done.

Day 6

Apparetly, Madison thinks she has had a rough day! I think she is getting tired of my snapping so many pictures of her. This was the last picture I took of her today. After taking about 15 pictures, she looked at Shane and did this pose. So glad I got a picture of it. She cracks us up!

Today, my dad came up to the house to watch Madison for me while I went to Marianna for a doctors appointment. I was gone for about 3 hours. Those two have so much fun together. I love it when I come home and see the joy on my dad's face and listening to it in his voice as he is telling me about what all they did. I am so blessed to have such a great family.

When I came back from my doctor's appointment, I had a horrible headache. After dad left, I put Madison in the bed with me and laid down. I truly believe Madison can sense when I am sick. She just laid there holding my hand and never gave me in trouble. She did keep trying to give me her pappy (pacifier). After a few times of me not taking it, she reached over and stuffed in my face. I finally took it and held it like it was in my mouth and we both drifted off to sleep. Another wonderful day we have been blessed with!

Day 5

I wanted to post this picture of Madison and mom that I took today at church. Mom was honored this morning with the Presbyterian Woman of the Year award. I am so proud of her and so blessed to have her as mom.

Mom does do much for us and I know we do not thank her enough. I know that this journey we are going down would be so much harder if we didn't have mom and dad to help us. I am truly grateful for all that they do for us.

Madison has had a great day. We all went to church this morning and then went out to lunch with mom and dad. We got our Sunday afternoon nap in. After that, it was time to tackle Madison's closet and dresser drawer. I hate doing this! I did shed a some tears when I opened a box of old clothes and it contained her preemie and newborn clothes. It was so hard to remember how small Madison was. Where did the past 3 years ago? I can't believe how fast time is flying by. I am so not ready for this.

I was cleaning out one of Madison's drawer that had just blankets in it. She came up behind me in her walker and pointed to the blanket, looked at me, and said "blanket." I am so happy to hear her talking so much. She is saying about 2-3 new words a day right now.

One last story....tonight for dinner I cooked pig-in-the-blankets and I had the hot dogs boiling on the stove. Madison was in the kitchen with me. The water started boiling over the pan and started smoking and Madison pointed up to the stove and said "uh oh." Shane and I both started laughing. I love making precious memories with my precious family!

Day 4

We haven't had a very exciting day today. Shane had to go up to his Mama's house and mow her yard. Madison and I stayed home and cleaned the house.

At about 3:00, Madison started getting sleepy but she wanted me to lay down with her. This is one of my favorite things to do. See, when Amy and I were little, my Granny Holley would keep us everyday. When we would go to take a nap we would all three pile in her bed and tell stories. If one of us got the giggles we would all get them and Granny would be laughing harder than any of us. Madison reminds me so much of her. When Madison and I lay down, she gets the giggles and can't stop laughing. This goes on for about 30 minutes and then she is out. Everyday I am always reminded of my sweet, precious Granny when Madison does this. It warms my heart when I am reminded of all the great memories we made. I miss her so much and wish she could be here with us. I know for a fact that her and Madison would have a ball together because they are like two peas in pod.

Day 3

I had to post this picture of Madison giving her "serious look" to me tonight when I asked her if she was ready to go to bed. We can't help but laugh every time she does this.

This has been such a busy day for us. Madison woke up before 11:00 this morning. YAY!! We had some errands we needed to run. I needed to go to the tire store, the bank, Walmart, the grocery store and have lunch with dad. We had lunch with dad after Walmart and before the grocery store. We picked him up and he rode with us.

At lunch, dad decided that he would go with me and push Madison in the grocery cart for me....BIG MISTAKE!! When I go to the grocery store I am on a mission to get in and get out as quickly as possible. Dad, however, takes his sweet time...getting a cup of coffee, stopping at the pharmacy to say hello, etc, etc. I am walking way ahead of him getting stuff to put in the cart telling him to stay behind me. He has to show Madison everything in the grocery store!! It was cute but it wasn't.

After we dropped dad off Madison feel asleep in the car and got a good nap in before daddy got home. The biggest news is that Madison as started talking up a storm this week! With her disease the children have a very limited vocabulary but each child is different so it is hard to tell how many words they will say. Right now, she can say about 15-20 words. Today, she added more to that number and said "boat," "pool," "thank you," "aww man" and "yuck." She dropped a toy tonight and since she can't bend down to pick it up, she points to it and says "please." After Shane handed her the toy, she looked up at him and said "thank you" and smiled so big. Shane and I both started praising her. Then she went on and on saying it.

The moment I am most proud of though is this. Right now, Madison can't say hardly any sentences. The only sentence she says is "I did it". Tonight I took her outside because she loves to walk around the pool at night. I had the pool light on for her and took her out and she pointed to the pool and looked at me and said "pool." I said "Yes baby. That's the pool." Then she looked back at me and said "I wanna du in du pool." I just stared at her in complete shock and then ran inside with her to tell Shane. Of course she wouldn't say it again. All she would say is "da pool." It's moments like that I wish I had the video camera handy.

Once again Lord, I thank you for giving me another day to enjoy our precious daughter and pray that I have many, many more of them.